


kaleidoscope heart

by WonderTwinC



Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: F/F, Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-08-29
Updated: 2016-07-14
Packaged: 2018-04-17 21:28:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 3,148
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4682102
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WonderTwinC/pseuds/WonderTwinC
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I fell in love with the world in you. [a series of ficlets]</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is a set of ficlets gathered from prompts I've received on tumblr. :)

**things you said that made me feel real**

* * *

 

“You’re not just Heir to the Demon,” Sara started one night, brushing her fingers through Nyssa’s hair.

Nyssa paused in her reading, raising her head so that the glasses she sometimes wore perched precariously on the edge of her nose. “Is something troubling you, Sara?”

“It’s just-” the blonde frowned, her nose scrunching up in frustration as she searched for the right words, “Everyone here just refers to you as Heir To the Demon. Even in the small outlying areas around Nanda Parbat you’re known as such.”

“It is who I am, Habiti,” Nyssa reasoned, laying the book in her lap to give Sara her full attention. “It is who I always have been, who I will always be. I was raised for no other purpose than to succeeded my father as the next Ra’s Al Ghul when the time comes.”

Sara shook her head, cupping Nyssa’s cheek in her free hand. “You might be his heir, but that doesn’t define you. You’re Nyssa. You like spicy food and sitting out late at night to stare at the stars. You like mountain climbing for some ridiculous reason I haven’t figured out yet. You’re favorite color is yellow,go figure,” she smiled then, just a little, leaning down to press a kiss to Nyssa’s nose, bumping against her glasses. “You like to read about culture and history and you act like you hate those trashy romance novels but you don’t. Not really.”

She curled her finger along her girlfriend’s jaw, holding her gaze. “And you love me, an outsider.”

Nyssa frowned at the last bit, opening her mouth to protest. “You are not an outsider, Ta’er al-Sahfer-”

“But I am, at least to the League. Just because I came back doesn’t mean they trust me, not like you,” she sighed. “The point is, I just want you to remember that you’re more than all of this-” Sara gestured to the room around them, the four walls binding them in place within Nanda Parbat. “You are always going to be more than this.”

Nyssa fought back tears, her eyes burning as she shut them tight. She could feel Sara move above her, settling until they were chest to chest with her discarded book still resting between them. “You’re gonna be free someday,” Sara whispered, cupping Nyssa’s face within her hands.

She opened her eyes, the image of Sara blurred from tears. She smiled. “I already am.”


	2. Chapter 2

**things you said when we were the happiest we ever were**

* * *

"You know I love you, right?" Sara raises her head from Nyssa’s shoulder as she speaks, looking down at her lover in the dim lighting of their private quarters.

Nyssa stirs, her hand smoothing down along the expanse of Sara’s back as she opens her eyes. It's hard to make out her Canary's expression in the light of just a few candles, but there's something there that makes Nyssa hold her breath. "Of course, Habiti," her voice sounds gravelly to her own ears, rough with sleep. Her brow furrows. "I had hoped that you realized I felt the same."

"No, no -  that's not it," Sara is quick to reassure her, stumbling over her words as her hand comes up to press against Nyssa’s cheek. Her expression softens. "I know you love me, Nyssa. I just -" she hesitates. Her thumb brushes along the top of Nyssa’s cheek bone. "I just wanted to say it. That's all."

Nyssa hums, the sound low and deep and full of pleasure. She smiles, turning her head to kiss the tips of her Beloved's fingers. "And now that you have done so, would it be ill of me to go back to sleep?"

There is a teasing lilt to her tone. It makes Sara smile as she huffs, settling back down with her body curled against Nyssa’s side and her head resting against her shoulder once more. "And here I thought that'd at least get me a kiss," Sara grumbles, burying her face in the hollow between Nyssa’s shoulder and neck to hide her smile when her lover presses her lips to the top of her head.

"You have had your kiss and a bit more than that, I daresay." Nonetheless, Nyssa presses another kiss to Sara's blonde head before she closes her eyes again. "Go to sleep, Habiti."

"Yeah, yeah," the protest is halfhearted at best and rendered meaningless when Sara shuts her eyes.

In the morning, Ta'er al-Sahfer is gone.

 

 

 


	3. Chapter 3

**things you said after you kissed me**

* * *

 

Sara’s lips were warm and soft beneath her own and Nyssa felt that, for a moment, she couldn’t breath. She could not remember who had initiated the kiss - or for what reasons - but she did know one thing.

She did not want it to end.

Her fingers tangled in the fabric of Sara’s tank top, keeping her close in the only way that Nyssa knew how. Sara jerked beneath her touch, pulling away from the kiss with a short, sharp laugh that startled the other woman.

She was grinning, though, her eyes shining as she rested her hands on top of Nyssa’s.

Sara licked her lips, the grin turning a bit wicked. “You taste like chocolate,” she announced, leaning in somewhat.

Nyssa startled, a bit surprised. “Chocolate?”

Nodding, the blonde leaned in, pressing a kiss to Nyssa’s jaw. “Yeah, you taste like chocolate. Specifically,” Sara whispered, and Nyssa could feel the other woman smiling against her skin, “a chocolate kiss.”

“You are a ridiculous little bird,” Nyssa whispered, sliding her arms around Sara’s waist as the other woman chuckled, warm breath gusting against her lover’s skin.

Sara wrapped her arms around Nyssa’s neck, tilting her head back to grin at her companion.  “You love me.”

Nyssa smiled.

 


	4. Chapter 4

**last kiss**

* * *

Nyssa stirs, blinking sleepily against her pillow as she listens to the quiet sounds of Sara rummaging around their room. “Habibti,” she murmurs, the word muffled against her silk pillow case as she stretches her legs beneath the maroon sheets.

Somewhere to her left, she hears Sara drop something. “Shit - sorry, sorry,” Sara mumbles, her voice rasping as it does in the mornings, soft and low and settling warm in Nyssa’s chest. “I was trying not to wake you,” she grumbles.

Nyssa laughs, rolling onto her side. “You have never been a quiet one, Ta'er al-Sahfer.”

Sara is standing near their closet with her leather jacket in hand. Her gray duffle bag is just by the door, already packed and ready to go. The physical reminder that Sara is leaving for Starling on her own is enough to dim the smile on the other woman’s face.

Sara offers a sheepish, endearing smile. “Sorry, Nyssa,” she apologizes, sliding her jacket on with practiced ease. Nyssa watches as she approaches the bed, placing one knee against the mattress to leverage herself up as she leans in.

The kiss is slow and gentle and all of the things that Nyssa loves about her. When they part, Sara is grinning because she _knows_. She always knows.

“I shouldn’t be gone for too long. Two weeks, tops,” Sara whispers, leaning in for another quick kiss. “I’ll call when I can, okay?”

Nyssa nods, raising one hand to cup Sara’s jaw, drawing her back in for another chaste kiss. And then another.

Sara pulls away with quiet laughter, her lips catching at the corner of Nyssa’s mouth as she climbs off the bed. “Love you,” she calls over her shoulder, grabbing her duffle bag and slinging it across her shoulder.

“And I you, Habibti. And I you.” 


	5. Chapter 5

**hold my hand**

* * *

 

She has already met her little yellow bird's parents before, her father more than once and usually under undesirable circumstances, but there is something about meeting them formally with a meal and Laurel in a public place that churns like sickness within her gut.

She dresses casually, or as casually as she is able (and Laurel laughs when Nyssa tells her this and says 'Oh I know') and it still feels like too much and too little all at once.

"You look great," Sara tells her for the fifth time as they stand outside of the restaurant. Nyssa can see Laurel and her parents inside at a window table and her heart stops for a moment before it races out of control because how is she supposed to face these people when she's done them so much wrong -

Sara grabs her hand. "Stop worrying, Nyssa. I love you and Laurel loves you. They will too," she offers, squeezing gently.

  
Nyssa’s heart still races, but this time the uneven rhythm is from something else.


	6. Chapter 6

**cuddling for warmth**

* * *

 

“Fuck, it’s cold-” Sara rubs at her arms vigorously, standing in another city she can barely pronounce the name of with three other league members and Nyssa. Their hotel is warmer than the streets but not by much. The cold here seems to seep in through every single crack and despite a long sleeved shirt and her leather jacket - she’s fucking freezing.

“Language, Sara,” Nyssa chides softly, sitting on the bed in her room of the hotel. It’s extravagantly lavish with a large four poster bed and sheets of silk and warm, rich colors everywhere you look. Unlike Sara’s room down the hall it looks like it should be warm.

Sadly, it’s not.

It’s cold as fuck.

“How are you not freezing?” Sara questions, looking at Nyssa from where she’s sitting in a plush chair, legs curled under her body to keep her toes at least somewhat warm.

Nyssa just smiles and yeah, that sends a jolt of warm running through Sara’s veins but it wears off quickly enough. “I am accustomed to most kinds of weather, Ta’er al-Sahfer. The cold does not bother me.”

Sara huffs,  another shiver making her teeth chatter. “Why am I not surprised?” she grumbles half-heartedly.

Nyssa eyes her for a moment before she sighs her ‘what am I going to do with you’ sigh that Sara is more than a little familiar with after a few months of being apart of the League. Nyssa bestows one upon her at least twice a day.

Sometimes more.

Nyssa pats the empty space beside her on the bed. “Come.”

Sara stares in surprise.

Nyssa rolls her eyes, holding a corner of the blankets up with a somewhat exasperated expression. “Do you wish to be warm or not?”

Sara doesn’t have to be asked twice.

The bed is soft and the sheets are already somewhat warm from where Nyssa’s body heat has seeped into them. It causes a responding heat to prickle somewhat uncomfortably at Sara’s cheek and chest as she climbs beneath the covers.

Nyssa tugs at the sleeve of her leather jacket, persistently, until Sara sighs and shivers and lets the other woman help her out of it.

Holy fuck, it’s freezing. Did she mention that already?

“Lay on your side,” Nyssa instructs softly and Sara didn’t realize how bossy her boss was until now. It’s kind of hot. Probably the only hot thing in this whole damn city, honestly.

Sara feels her breath catch in her throat when Nyssa presses up behind her, burying her face against Sara’s neck and exhaling. Her warmth breath sparks a heat low in Sara’s gut. Nyssa doesn’t seem to notice as she her arms around Sara’s waist and squeezes.

When Sara shivers again, it has absolutely nothing to do with the cold.


	7. Chapter 7

**things you felt when I got sick**

* * *

 

Sara groaned, wallowing around in Nyssa’s silk sheets. “I’m dying,” the blonde grumbled, her voice sounding a bit hoarse to the assassin’s well trained ear. 

Sitting in a chair by her own bed, Nyssa huffed. “You are not dying, Ta’er al-Sahfer.” 

The truth of the matter being that Sara was actually quite ill. Despite the care that Nyssa had shown the other woman upon saving her from Lian Yu almost two years ago, her immune system had never quite recovered from the brutal beating it took out at sea. 

The sight of her Beloved, uncomfortable and weak, left her feeling quite unlike herself. Nyssa did her best not to let it show. 

“Nyssa-” Sara whined, tilting her head to look at the other woman. Her usually vibrant blue eyes were burning for an entirely different reason now. Along with a horrible cough and aching muscles, Sara had the good fortune to run a fever as well. She’d kept Nyssa awake all through the night and well into the early morning hours before exhaustion caught up to her. 

The pained expression upon her Beloved’s face cut through her like a knife. 

“Hush, little bird,” Nyssa whispered softly, brushing Sara’s wet hair away from her face with a cool, damp towel. “You are not dying, not today.”


	8. Chapter 8

**never say goodbye**

* * *

 

“You look scared,” Sara whispers, looking up at Nyssa from where her head is resting against her shoulder. Candles flicker in the darkness, illuminating the room in parts - letting Nyssa see only a fraction of Sara’s beautiful face.

Her fingers brush up and down against her Beloved’s arm above the maroon silk sheets. It’s comforting - the warmth of her lover’s bare skin against her fingers. It gives her courage.

Sara always gives her courage.

“I’m terrified,” Nyssa breathes.

“Of what?” Sara asks. She reaches up to cup Nyssa’s cheek, her fingers warm and calloused. Familiar.

Nyssa leans into the touch, closing her eyes with a trembling sigh. “Of losing you, Habiti.”

“Oh, hey, no,” Sara shifts until she’s propped up on one arm, her tone soft and worried and everything Nyssa always wants to hear.  The hand on her cheek moves, pressing lightly where her heart races within her chest. “No matter what happens, I’m always going to be right here,” Sara whispers, her lips brushing against Nyssa’s jaw. “You can’t get rid of me that easily,” her breath ghosts along her neck, sending shivers down her spine.

“Don’t ever say goodbye, Sara,” she whispers, the words catching in her throat.

“Never.”

Nyssa’s heart skips a beat.

She opens her eyes to a bright, windowed room. The bed beside her is empty and cold and the sheets are a soft, cotton lilac instead of vivid, silky maroon. She is still half dressed in her League armor - pieces of it digging uncomfortably against her skin when she moves.

“Nyssa-” the door cracks open and Laurel peers in, already dressed in one of the suits that she favors. Her smile falters at the bewildered look on the other woman’s face. “Is everything alright?”

And oh - how she misses Sara… how she will perhaps always miss her, but here in this room… in this moment- Nyssa can’t help but believe what her little yellow bird said.

_“No matter what happens, I’m always going to be right here.”_

Running a hand along her chest, feeling the rhythmic beat of her own heart, Nyssa smiles.

“It will be.” 


	9. Chapter 9

It felt like she was flying - flying or falling and the world was slowing on it’s axis around her. The sky was dark and bright all at once and cold air pressed in against her bare skin, whipping against her face until her mask slipped away and oh - she needed that.

She needed -  _Nyssa._

She couldn’t breathe. She couldn’t move. Her thoughts were as violent as waves, smashing against one another, but she could remember.

She could remember lying on a bed in a far away place and laughing until her face hurt - until she could barely breathe - and there was a woman that she loved beside her, whispering a hundred different endearments that warmed her in a hundred different ways.

And that same dark haired woman told her that she loved her - that she was everything in this world that she held dear.

_Nyssa._

Her heart skipped one beat, then another, and another, until the world was just a blur and everything was moving too fast, too out of control.

Pain dulled her senses - muted everything and nothing.  Blood caught in her throat - bitter and sharp in her mouth.

And oh - how she wanted to be back there on that bed in that place with that woman and those words and that smile.

That moment and that feeling.

_Nyssa._

Sara’s body crashed against the pavement - and then darkness. 

 

> _i never told you, but there was a time last spring where everything was going perfectly and i was actually happy and i was lying in your bed and laughing about something and for a second i fell silent and closed my eyes because i knew this was as happy as i was going to get and that there was certainly a storm brewing on the horizon and i knew i had to be as grateful as i could get because it would all one day evaporate (it later did, i knew it), but in that pause you whispered, “i love you so damn much” and i think about that moment a lot now, about being so filled to the brim with good things and god i wish it was better i wish i’d held onto that i wish i was in your bed instead of miles away with a mouth full of blood come back come back my love_

 


	10. Chapter 10

**solitude**

* * *

 

She could not help but to think of Sara when locked in this place.

Nyssa stared around the room,  _her_   _room_ , and felt the memories like a blow to the face. She’d shared this room with her Beloved for a time, touched her and held her and kissed her in this very spot - loved her during the ten steps it took to get from the door to the bed. 

She never missed Sara more than when she was in Nanda Parbat, surrounded by a thousand faces and yet completely, utterly alone. She had always enjoyed the solitude of her home, her room, until Sara’s laughter echoed from every corner, filling every empty space with warmth and happiness. 

Nyssa brushed her fingers along the wine colored duvet, imagining Sara curled beneath the sheets, grumbling about having to wake up so early.. and she laughed.

She laughed until she cried, her solitude turning to ash in her mouth.


	11. Chapter 11

_prompt: Nyssa grabbed Sara's hand and held it gently, "Are you sure about this?"_

_\---_

“I’m positive,” she replied, smiling softly as she gently pulled Nyssa into her space until they were standing toe to toe. Her heart hammered erratically within her chest as Nyssa slowly laced their fingers together, never once dropping her gaze. Sara wasn’t quite sure which of them took initiative (she never would be able to remember that detail correctly), but there was a moment of space between them and then nothing as Nyssa’s lips cautiously brushed against her own. 

 _Oh_ , Sara thought to herself as her toes curled within her boots and her heart stopped with her chest. 

She was in trouble.


End file.
